8 Weird Furniture Pieces To Fascinate and Disturb You
Nothing beats getting a gift you’re really crazy about. Wow, you think, my friends really get me, you know? They know me so well. I can’t wait to show this off.
Here’s a bunch of really awesome, practical, and decorative furniture ideas for friends and family. I can’t promise that they come cheap, but letting your loved ones know you appreciate and care for them is something you can’t put a price on, friends.
1. The Forever Fetal Mattress
Oh yes, finally–an excuse not to have to be big spoon for your needy boyfriend, am I right ladies? This is a mattress built for one. Finally, you have a legitimate excuse for making him sleep on the couch. Besides, who doesn’t love being forced to curl up into the fetal position for eight plus hours a night?
2. The Gift that Never Should Have Made it Through Customs
You told the in-laws they really, really didn’t have to bring you back anything from their cruise on the Italian Riviera. Don’t be silly, they said, But we’re taking all these fun day trips, and it’s just such a shame the whole family couldn’t come. Well okay, you said hesitantly, just bring us back something small. Mm-hm! your mother-in-law said. You wondered why there was a twinkle in her eye.
3. The Directionally-Challenged Sofa
For those that just aren’t very down-to-earth. Or don’t know up from down. You know who could have really used this, though? Joseph Gordon Levitt’s character in “Inception”…
4. The Passive-Aggressive Grass Couch
Sometimes all you want is a passive-aggressive way to let your husband know he needs to cut the lawn. Is that so much to ask? If you don’t pick up this mower right now, you say, I’m going to plant this flower on the sofa. See how comfortable watching ESPN is then.
5. The “You Have Options Beyond Taxadermy” Couch
Your husband started to cry when you suggested he consider taxadermy after his favorite pet tiger died. So that wasn’t an option…and then the light went on. He never said anything about making Tigga into a couch! He’s going to love it! And while you were at it, you got this freaky cow-couch made too. This should scare your baby nephews away from jumping on your furniture…
6. The Gone Fishing Toilet
You always knew your Dad wasn’t an animal person, but he crossed the line when your fish tank went missing and returned on your birthday…like this. You’re not sure who hates it more–you or the fish. You miss the lack of privacy and they hate being taunted with visions of death.
7. The “Feeeed Me” Chairs
Your sister never stops talking about how she was cheated out of the role of Audrey in “Little Shop of Horrors.” Okay here, sis. Now you can sit in your giant plant chair and pretend all you want. Just stop talking about it, please.
8. Crawl back under the rock you came from
You were okay with the kids getting beanbags until you saw all the tacky, bright colors they came in. Heck no, you said, That’ll totally mess with my grey-charcoal-beige color scheme! So you got these rock imitations instead. It makes sense, too, the more you think about it. Rock is so soft, right? Look at how well those kids are sleeping. Or, are they being crushed to death by the weight of boulders? It’s hard to tell…
So there you have it, friends. These weird and wonderful ideas just go to show that furniture doesn’t just have to be functional; it can be a true extension of who you are and what you’re feeling. Go ahead; grab one of these treasures for a boyfriend, in-law, or small child, and let the magic happen. They’re crying because they’re so happy. Really.